Another Entertaining Friday

5 paragraph essays are truly hated by high school students. By now, they should be able to whip one out in a class period. And you think that a weeks in MORE than enough time. Let me take you into the my classroom at HHS and let you experience the minds of high school students.

To set the stage, it's Friday and essays are due. I am not accepting them after I leave my classroom which was planned as 2:30...

Student #1: What if I am in the hospital?
Me: Get someone else to turn it in for you

Student #2: What if I am dead?
Me: Well, you sure won't care about your grade will you?

Student #3: What if we tape it on the window?
Me: No

Student #4: What about sliding it under the door?
Me: Then I throw it immediately in the recycle bin

Student #5: What if we catch you in the parking lot and give it to you then?
Me: NO

So, 2:30 and I am packed and headed out the door. Computer is off, bag is packed, keys in hand. Students walk in and start asking about the grade. I am bugged but answer as I begin to walk to the door. They stay put. Then, some random girl I have never seen asks me about the class.

Random Student: What class is this?
Me: American Studies

Random Student: So, you like, study history of America?
Me: (Thinking who is this girl and are you serious but answer)...Yes, United States History

Random Student: So, like who is your favorite president?
Me: (Really bugged at this point) Uh....George Washington (and I head to the door)

Random Student: Oh, I thought it would be Lincoln. He's everyones...
Me: ( I interrupt as I see the others now laughing) Sorry but I've gotta go. See ya

Random Student as we walk out the door: What would you say if we told you that we were trying to stall you so someone can turn in their paper?
Me: Thanks for being honest but no. I'm out the door!

2 minutes later by the office, Procrastinating Students breathless runs to me

Procrastinating Student: Can I turn it in? Please?
Me: No. Sorry! I will take it but you won't be getting a grade!!!

Procrastinating Student with what looks like tears about to fall: Ok. I understand

I hate to be mean and yes, many of you may be saying, "you jerk....take the dang paper" But, I just can't do it. I guess it just teaches a lesson....and makes for some pretty interesting excuses!